hiking, ticks and the future

Ugh. I hiked a ton today. At least, it felt like forever. I don't know how far I went, but I know I walked straight for five hours. I've got a pretty nice sun burn going right now, and my feet are quite tired. I'm excited for sleep.

I'm supposed to go see Prince Caspian tonight at midnight, but I'm leaning away from seeing it. I've already got my ticket, but I don't know if I can stay awake that long... and I don't exactly want to see the movie, anyway. We'll see when the time rolls around.

Hiking allowed me to accrue some ticks, which didn't please me at all. I've picked five or six of them off my body, and I'm praying there aren't any more burying themselves. There's nothing NOTHING grosser than feeling that gross little body, and looking down to just see that darn ticks butt stretching into the sky and his little stupid head buried deep within... wherever. Yeah. Way gross.

I'm leaving for Merrill tomorrow... and I guess I'm settling into that thought. Right now, before I start, I can have one of a few predispositions: I can be nervous, scared, excited... anything! But two weeks from now, no matter what my feelings right now, I'm going to be settling into the position and moving forward. I don't see any other way for it to be. I'll eventually get to the place where I'm comfortable, where I know what's going on, and where I'm not confused, nervous or scared. So why be those things now? They're perfectly natural, and there's really nothing to worry about.

I'm feeling like I'm at a pretty good place, all told. Maybe I'll get broadsided and quit within a month. But I really doubt it. God is good, and he'll use me to his good purposes. All I have to do is sit back and do what I do best - be me.

But after all, it isn't easy being me.